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The Help

Posted by: In: Fellowship Women 07 Dec 2011 Comments: 0 Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Rising from Ignobility to Nobility

By Judy Engstrom

We as women need to think differently about who we are and how God made us.  We need to accentuate the difference between men and women and take advantage of the way God made us instead of taking a back seat because of our differences.

When God “formed” Eve from Adam, it was to help Adam.  Things had digressed to “not being good” for him to be alone any longer.  The word for “help” does not imply an inferior but a superior help in Old Testament usage.  Of the 21 times it is used in the Old Testament, 18 times it is used to refer to divine help and only 3 times does it refer to human help.  It is the same word used in Psalm 121:2, “My help comes from the Lord.”  The word used for “meet” is a preposition which refers to something of great value and affection ‘as set before us’, as in Isaiah 49:16, “Thy walls are before me.”  When God separated Eve from Adam, He “elaborated” her and intended the development of the social virtues, as an aid for Adam.[1]

Helpmeet has commonly been equivocated with “assistant”, but that is not what God had in mind.  Men and women alike need a new understanding and a redefinition of what it means to be a helpmeet.  More than a servant, a helpmeet enables and empowers to make possible what was not possible before.  She is more the completer or the enabler.

Normally, when we think of an enabler we think in negative terms.  But just look at it, when a woman enables an alcoholic husband, she makes it possible for him to keep doing what is immensely destructive in both their lives.  She goes against all that is good and positive to cover and “protect” what is evil and destructive.  It is powerful and keeps him weak, dependent and disabled.

On the other hand, when done rightly, woman can enable and empower to great and noble things.  God intended for Adam and Eve to take dominion over the earth together.  Unfortunately, they “agreed” in sin instead, which brought the great divide.  That was the beginning of the gender gap, and the struggle for dominion then turned to one another.  The answer isn’t found in one taking dominion over the other or in usurping authority from one another but in standing in love for what is right before the Lord.  God provided a way of peace, and it is to love and honor.  When he loves her and she honors him, peace comes and the enemy is outsmarted.

One of the greatest giftings God has given women generally is that of wisdom.  Because of the great mother’s heart He put in women, we are more likely to feel the heart of God toward a situation quicker.  Wisdom really is love expressed in the practical and understanding out of a heart of love what needs to happen in a given circumstance for a person or situation.  People can say they have love, but if that love is not expressed in some practical way, what good is it?  It’s like faith, faith without works is dead.  So is love without expression.  But it takes wisdom to know how that love is best expressed for the good of the person and the situation.

This great gift can be a saving gift.  In II Samuel 20 King David’s commander of the army, Joab, was on the hunt for the rebel Sheba who had raised his hand against King David.  Sheba fled to a city called Abel, and Joab raised up a siege mound against the city.  In verse 15 we are told, Then a wise woman cried out from the city, “Hear, hear!  Please say to Joab, ‘Come nearby, that I may speak with you.’”  When he had come near to her, the woman said, “Are you Joab?”  He answered “I am.”  Then she said to him, “Hear the words of your maidservant.”  And he answered, “I am listening.”  So she spoke, saying, “They used to talk in former times, saying, ‘They shall surely seek guidance at Abel,’ and so they would end disputes.  “I am among the peaceable and faithful in Israel.  You seek to destroy a city and a mother in Israel.  Why would you swallow up the inheritance of the Lord?”  And Joab answered and said “Far be it, far be it from me, that I should swallow up or destroy!  That is not so.  But a man from the mountains of Ephraim, Sheba the son of Bichri by name, has raised his hand against the king, against David.  Deliver him only, and I will depart from the city.”  So the woman said to Joab, “Watch, his head will be thrown to you over the wall.”  Then the woman in her wisdom went to all the people.  And they cut off the head of Sheba the son of Bichri, and threw it out to Joab.  Then he blew a trumpet, and they withdrew from the city, every man to his tent.  So Joab returned to the king at Jerusalem.

That woman saved her husband, her family, her city.  She was desperate, cried out to God and stepped out to do what she felt in her heart to do.  We, too, can get answers from the Lord for situations in our homes, our schools, our churches and our nation.  If we are willing to believe that God made us to make a difference and that He will answer our cry to Him, we can stand in the Truth and receive what we need.  Go for it Women of God!  What is there to fear?  If God is for us, who can be against us? (Romans 8:31)


[1] Bushnell, Kathryn.  God’s Word to Women, 2004, p.15.

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